Tired

I’m always tired.  Chronically tired.  I sleep too much and I’m still tired. It’s nothing physical – at least, I’ve been tested for everything.

Two revelations today:

1. I’m going to keep praying for relief.  God healed me from my depression (through medication, but I count it as being healed because I am no longer SUFFERING and I’ve tried plenty of medications which didn’t work) after many, many years.  I don’t know why he waited so long.  But he did and I have to believe he can heal me from this too.  I’d prefer for it to happen right now and I don’t know why we have to wait on these things.

2. I have a lot of resentments.  Many, many resentments.  I can’t stand injustice and I mean everything from someone treats me slightly badly to slavery and sex trafficking.  It gets in my head and I can’t get it out.  I obsess, I get angry, I want to yell and convince anyone around me.  Maybe it’s not the best way to deal with it.  Maybe it’s exhausting me.  To tell you the truth, I don’t know another way to deal with it.  Maybe it’s time to figure one out.

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One Response to Tired

  1. mon says:

    I can relate to your being tired all the time. It’s like a lethargy that never leaves you. I hate it.

    And the overwhelming feelings about how screwed up the world is… yeah, been there too. I had to stop watching/listening/reading the news. But I’ve discovered that when I’m in a “funk” is when all those kinds of thoughts start racing through my head. Not that knowing that helps because these “funks” just come without warning and in no particular pattern.

    Anyway, I’m sure many of us can understand. And if you need to vent about how effed up things are here on your blog, I wouldn’t think bad about you. It’s good therapy.
    =)

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