April 6, 2012

Like I said, things seem to have been moving really quickly.  I’m thrilled to have so much work at the moment, and I’m enjoying what I’m doing but I’m also lonely.  I have a lot of good friends, which is a tremendous blessing, but I really miss having someone to share all of my joys and concerns and goals and irritations and everything.  It’s been several years, but I’m finding myself really missing my ex-boyfriend for some reason.  He had a lot (a LOT) of unaddressed problems but we had a lot of fun together and I could relax and be myself in a way I can’t very often.  He really knew me too and I miss that.

Part of the discouragement comes from the fact that it’s something I’d be willing to wait for but I don’t know if I’ll have that again.  It gets less likely as I get older and it’s hard to wait for something that you have no guarantee of ever happening.