A Partial List of Reasons I’m Anxious

I thought I’d write it down so I had a better idea and maybe less “free-floating” anxiety, so, here is a partial list of reasons I’m anxious:

  1. I’m packing for vacation and might forget something
  2. The airline might lose my suitcase
  3. I had a blood vessel burst in my eye and it looks gross although it’s benign
  4. The doorknob on the bedroom that my new housemate will move into doesn’t work and the landlord isn’t answering me
  5. Something I sent priority mail got lost and the post office is not answering me
  6. My dog is 7 years old and won’t live forever
  7. What if my housing costs go up and I have to move out of the area?
  8. What if I have to move and can’t find a place that will take dogs?
  9. I have to figure out how to market the book I wrote
  10. I have to drive on the wrong side of the road in a couple of days
  11. I have to remember what I said I’d get people for souvenirs
  12. My nephew and nieces will grow up in a world that is not safe
  13. I might need to buy disability insurance because I’m self-employed
  14. I don’t know how to buy disability insurance
  15. Do I need long-term care insurance?
  16. I might not be able to sleep on the plane
  17. I’m spending money on therapy and it might not be helping me so I might be wasting my money
  18. I might get into a car accident one day
  19. I will miss my dog when I’m gone
  20. I might write another book
  21. I might never write another book
  22. I might have way too much work
  23. I might not have enough work

Clearly I could keep going and going. And this is not a particularly stressful time, this is just my head ALL THE TIME.

Anyone else end up like this? Any great coping mechanisms? Today I lay on my bed for about an hour holding my dog’s paw (she has this new thing where she loves holding hands) which helped. Temporarily.

The interesting thing is that I don’t think anyone who doesn’t know me well can tell! I hide it pretty well.

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2 Responses to A Partial List of Reasons I’m Anxious

  1. Janet Sheets says:

    One tactic that has helped me a tiny bit is trying to interrupt my negative thought-cycle as soon as it starts. I tell myself, “not that,” and force myself to think of something — anything — else, even if it’s only for an instant. I’m not trying to convince myself that I shouldn’t be anxious. I’m not trying to tell myself that my problems aren’t real. I’m just trying to prevent the horrible thought-pattern from cementing itself further. If I can fight anxiety for the briefest moment instead of being sucked in deeper, it’s a victory. For that single moment, I didn’t allow the anxiety to get worse . . . I fought it. That’s honorable, even if it isn’t the healing I want.

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